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Microgram- communicate clearer

By justin bolivar on August 5, 2017

Greetings Colleagues,

For assignment #3, I am proud to present Microgram, a mobile application that allows students to enhance their grammar skills, and presents teachers with a new way to teach grammar in the classroom. Microgram focuses on changing writing habits versus simply correcting mistakes. Instead of teaching grammar through worksheets (which is how it is usually done), students use an engaging application based environment that has them interact with different writing mechanics.

Please review the following pitches below:

Elevator Pitch*updated August 10th via feedback

YouTube Preview Image

Venture Pitch

I look forward to receiving your feedback on this venture, and will upload my reflection at the end of the week.

Thank-you in advance for your consideration of this endeavour.

–  The Microgram team (Justin Bolivar)

 

Reflection:

Receiving candid and honest feedback is incredibly helpful, so it was great to see what went well in the pitch, and what can be improved for our next product. Overall, Microgram was received well, getting a four out of five star rating.

I’ve divided some of the key words/ideas from EVA feedback:

Pros:

  • CUBE analysis of business
  • Competition flaws
  • Goals with funding
  • Rationale for Mobile and Microlearning. Great to have addition of Microlearning.
  • Enthusiasm for pitch
  • Use technology that students and schools already have
  • Visual charts for Microgram process
  • Educational research for the benefits of learning using the product.

Cons:

  • Initial long elevator pitch. This has now been trimmed down to 1:10.
  • Marketing to teachers individually and app resources in class
  • Concerns about mobile devices (as per research, almost 80% of students have access to some sort of device in the classroom. Keeping my district and region in mind, this number is actually low, I’ve experienced closer to 95%).
  • Long roll out (EVA wants to launch sooner)
  • Increased use of media (especially on “The Ask” page).
  • Investor focus vs. consumer focus.
  • Text heavy/navigation
  • Differentiation between packages
  • Amount of money for venture (need to work on company valuation)

What worked:

Being a student, learning grammar frustrated me as I was being told by a worksheet what to do, and had to wait to receive feedback on what I did wrong. It was not until my second year of University that I was introduced to learning grammar in a constructive way. It was done through a diagnostic piece of writing where our instructor examined our writing tendencies and offered areas of improvement. This is where Microgram comes from, and is also where I base my teaching today. Thus, this is where my enthusiasm for the project comes. Overall, I feel as if I covered the competition well in the venture pitch and differentiated ourselves from the other products in the market. The visuals that I did include helped to demonstrate how the product actually works, as both a visual for investors and customers. As an investor, I would want to know how customers actually access products and how they’re actually use them rather than looking at just an idea. With this, I also feel that the CUBE Analysis was a great differentiation piece for the pitch, in that we evaluated ourselves and demonstrated where our strengths lie. I also feel that the additional educational research that went into the pitch shows that we are grounded in educational philosophies that will ultimately improve the user’s end goal of improving their grammar.

Changes:

The most common concern that arose was the length of the elevator pitch. Initially, it was much too long. After receiving some great feedback from Scott and Kevin, I have shortened elevator pitch down to a reasonable 1:18. During the venture process, I found the elevator pitch to be one of the hardest elements due to its concise nature. However, the value in having a quick, succinct pitch is necessary since it would be something that is explained repeatedly in the startup world. I’m happy with the new pitch as I feel that it more accurately explains our product.

Ryan Dorey’s feedback to have GURUs use app and help promote the program through different avenues such as social media, professional development seminars, and word of mouth would be helpful to the marketing process. Marketing was a challenge for this product in terms of getting the word out there, but to have evangelists for the product would take us in an excellent direction. With this, I also see connections to other ventures in our course such as LearnFold and The World of Prodigy.

Another change that I would make to the venture pitch would be to include further visuals on the site, and not rely on a text-heavy presentation. I would change the pitch to include explanation videos for “The Ask” and a quicker version of how the application works. Further, videos on the growth of the mobile learning market would also help potential investors to see the potential in this rapidly growing market. Also, following Stephanie’s suggesting, adding “structure” buttons at the end of each page to follow a sequence would help establish a workflow of the venture.

Finally, considering the investor focus versus consumer, this was something that I wrestled with in assignment 1 and that I focused on in assignment 3. With respect to the customer in the venture pitch, I feel as if I dedicated the “What is Microgram” to the customer, with the other remaining pages focused on the investor. By providing the CUBE analysis, as well as a breakdown of how our customers use the product, the intention of this was to be transparent about what we do and focus on who our customer is. I feel as if the CUBE analysis is essential to this pitch for it outlines our growth plan, our competitors, and what we will do to be successful. In considering the elevator pitch, I believe the first iteration was very customer heavy (hence the length), and I hope that the new version will satisfy investors.

Rating
Average: 4/5 Stars
 
 
 
 
 
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12 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

Hi Justin, Love the elevator pitch. Was kept engaged in interested. Who doesn’t want to improve grammar? Love the idea of using mobile technology and user-data to pinpoint and personalize learning and improve skill. You thought of everything! From how it the app works to staffing to investors!

12 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
Janna @jannaldw

Hi Justin, Love the elevator pitch. Was kept engaged in interested. Who doesn’t want to improve grammar? Love the idea of using mobile technology and user-data to pinpoint and personalize learning and improve skill. You thought of everything! From how it the app works to staffing to investors!

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11 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

Hello Justin, Thank you for this venture, I have to say that your detailed website has covered all the questions that any investor would have. I think Your Elevator Pitch is very reliable to see the CEO of a company to advertise his own product rather than a presentation that can be done by any one. The venture is a great idea that we all need it in our writing, not just students, however, I am understanding from your presentation that this Microgram app is designed just for students in all levels. In addition to that, this app is designed as an application so it cannot be used in desk tops at all. Most of the teachers today, if not all of them work with the big screen desk top or a laptop to mark the student's' work. So my advice here is to allow this application to be used on computers too. The detailed process of how this app works was great, but it is very long for students. Currently, I am working in a school that has Google as a base for all of our communications, we are a google school. When students write their essays and submitted it to their teachers who will then add comments and send it back to the students. Then the student will rewrite the essay and send it back for final mark. All of this process is done through Google products for free and it is all electronically done. I know that adding the computer component will create a larger category of comparatives than you have mentioned in your website, however, I can see the potential growth of your application within these competitors anyway. Your Pitch Venture is a great opportunity for investors. Good luck.

11 Aug
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Ghassan @gassgass

Hello Justin, Thank you for this venture, I have to say that your detailed website has covered all the questions that any investor would have. I think Your Elevator Pitch is very reliable to see the CEO of a company to advertise his own product rather than a presentation that can be done by any one. The venture is a great idea that we all need it in our writing, not just students, however, I am understanding from your presentation that this Microgram app is designed just for students in all levels. In addition to that, this app is designed as an application so it cannot be used in desk tops at all. Most of the teachers today, if not all of them work with the big screen desk top or a laptop to mark the student's' work. So my advice here is to allow this application to be used on computers too. The detailed process of how this app works was great, but it is very long for students. Currently, I am working in a school that has Google as a base for all of our communications, we are a google school. When students write their essays and submitted it to their teachers who will then add comments and send it back to the students. Then the student will rewrite the essay and send it back for final mark. All of this process is done through Google products for free and it is all electronically done. I know that adding the computer component will create a larger category of comparatives than you have mentioned in your website, however, I can see the potential growth of your application within these competitors anyway. Your Pitch Venture is a great opportunity for investors. Good luck.

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9 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

Elevator pitch was too long, and you filmed in the wrong perspective, no one likes looking at black spaces on the side of their videos, turn your camera 90 degrees and film it properly, it will give a lot more of a professional feel to your video. It also felt more directed at selling the product to customers over investors. These nitpicks aside, you had more passion in your video than in all the other videos I have watched today. A million dollars is a lot of money for a venture like this, and I am not 100% sure that you really need that much, or that you have properly defined how you expect to recoup that investment for only a 25% stake in the company, you are going to have to get a lot of customers and how you yourself are going to be able to market your product to attract them. Overall, a great job, but not 100% sure that I would invest in this venture.

9 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
scott meech @scottty

Elevator pitch was too long, and you filmed in the wrong perspective, no one likes looking at black spaces on the side of their videos, turn your camera 90 degrees and film it properly, it will give a lot more of a professional feel to your video. It also felt more directed at selling the product to customers over investors. These nitpicks aside, you had more passion in your video than in all the other videos I have watched today. A million dollars is a lot of money for a venture like this, and I am not 100% sure that you really need that much, or that you have properly defined how you expect to recoup that investment for only a 25% stake in the company, you are going to have to get a lot of customers and how you yourself are going to be able to market your product to attract them. Overall, a great job, but not 100% sure that I would invest in this venture.

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9 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

Justin, this is a great venture and would be useful for anybody regardless of age. This venture has room for growth and can be applied in the workplace setting or for general professional development. I would like to see a bit more explanation about the benefits of microlearning, which I believe is the main element that distinguishes Microgrammar from its competitors. I don't see much of a difference in the basic and premium packages, that justifies the $1.00 cost. The profit margin seems min. based on the cost of services provided. If you could 'beef-up' the premium package with features that would be more appealing to consumer, a fee of more than $1.00 would be reasonable. On a side note, I appreciate that as the CEO and founder, you are passionate about the venture and are willing to earn less to support your team growth. To personally pitch your venture in front of the camera...well you definitely deserve high props for that.

9 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
madeleine lee @madlee

Justin, this is a great venture and would be useful for anybody regardless of age. This venture has room for growth and can be applied in the workplace setting or for general professional development. I would like to see a bit more explanation about the benefits of microlearning, which I believe is the main element that distinguishes Microgrammar from its competitors. I don't see much of a difference in the basic and premium packages, that justifies the $1.00 cost. The profit margin seems min. based on the cost of services provided. If you could 'beef-up' the premium package with features that would be more appealing to consumer, a fee of more than $1.00 would be reasonable. On a side note, I appreciate that as the CEO and founder, you are passionate about the venture and are willing to earn less to support your team growth. To personally pitch your venture in front of the camera...well you definitely deserve high props for that.

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9 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

Hi Justin, great idea! Grammar is such an important part of education and something I feel has really been forgotten. I taught English for a few years in Asia and grammar was one of the main focuses in English class and it was funny because the majority of teachers had to learn the grammar concepts before they taught them because they didn't remember learning them in school. I only knew the concepts because English and French grammar are very similar and I remember taking French grammar courses in university. Your elevator pitch was great. You had a lot of enthusiasm and I loved how you incorporated so many important trends - microlearning, real time feedback, mobile technology - it seems like a very innovative product! Near the end you mentioned that you were the only grammar app on the market, which is a great competitive advantage but in general, I think your pitch should have been more focused on the investor. As a teacher and student, I totally got why I would want to check out your website to learn more about this cool app, but as an investor, I'm not sure it made me want to learn more. Your venture pitch was very extensive and had lots of great ideas. I'm impressed that as CEO you're willing to be paid less than the majority of your staff! The only comments I have was that it was very text heavy and I found it a little difficult to navigate. You want to make things as easy as possible for an investor so maybe you could incorporate a Next button that moves the reader from page to page instead of having to scroll back up to the top to find what I should look at next. Overall though, great job and thanks for sharing!

9 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
stephanie mcginnis @smcginni

Hi Justin, great idea! Grammar is such an important part of education and something I feel has really been forgotten. I taught English for a few years in Asia and grammar was one of the main focuses in English class and it was funny because the majority of teachers had to learn the grammar concepts before they taught them because they didn't remember learning them in school. I only knew the concepts because English and French grammar are very similar and I remember taking French grammar courses in university. Your elevator pitch was great. You had a lot of enthusiasm and I loved how you incorporated so many important trends - microlearning, real time feedback, mobile technology - it seems like a very innovative product! Near the end you mentioned that you were the only grammar app on the market, which is a great competitive advantage but in general, I think your pitch should have been more focused on the investor. As a teacher and student, I totally got why I would want to check out your website to learn more about this cool app, but as an investor, I'm not sure it made me want to learn more. Your venture pitch was very extensive and had lots of great ideas. I'm impressed that as CEO you're willing to be paid less than the majority of your staff! The only comments I have was that it was very text heavy and I found it a little difficult to navigate. You want to make things as easy as possible for an investor so maybe you could incorporate a Next button that moves the reader from page to page instead of having to scroll back up to the top to find what I should look at next. Overall though, great job and thanks for sharing!

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9 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

Hi Justin, Lots of thought put into this assignment.  Very professional. Appreciate your enthusiasm on camera for the elevator pitch as it showed the 'nuts and bolts' of your venture. Not sure what type of lighting you were using but it might have been improved with multiple light sources on both sides? That said, I like the forcefulness of your statements especially 1 min in when you stated "it ends now" and then introduced yourself and the company. With that in mind, I do believe the elevator pitch was not to exceed 1 min? Part of my discussion via email with Dr. Vogt was about the length of the pitch and in his words "most potential backers will have their decision made in 10-15 secs, so if it is going to be longer than 1 min you'd better be able to keep my attention". I know for me it was tough to keep mine to 1 min and I stressed out over it for sometime.  That said, you did a very good job keeping my attention for the 2 mins plus. I think it was the 'personal touch' that keep me there. Great job! As an English (grammar-loving) teacher I do agree with your concept that "grammar is the backbone of communication", and it is something we are losing in schools.  I like the fact that you were able to discuss the problem and sell a solution using technology that students already have.  With respect to the venture pitch your medium of communication (website) was a very good choice and the content presented was strong and convincing. Within your "Microgram Progress" section I enjoyed how you provided step-down visual charts using different color schemes.  As a potential investor and a visual person, I would have to say this helped me understand the process better and further facilitated my need to invest in your idea. Bravo! The use of imbedding a CUBE analysis within your online resource was another very good decision as it provides to the potential investors the entire story of your venture giving it further structure and strength.  I also appreciated your page/word choice called "The Ask" - a much better way to look for a pledge.  If I were to recommend any additions it would be the use of more media in the form of audio or video throughout the site especially on "The Ask" page if it was your intention to have that as your "kickstarter-like" page. Having audio and video of people using this product and supporting the direction you are going in may had further strength to a great package. Finally, I just wanted to highlight the content used in the "offerings" page as it provided extra support  from referenced research making  your argument a viable investment for me. I'm in! Great job!

9 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
Kevin Andrews @kevin

Hi Justin, Lots of thought put into this assignment.  Very professional. Appreciate your enthusiasm on camera for the elevator pitch as it showed the 'nuts and bolts' of your venture. Not sure what type of lighting you were using but it might have been improved with multiple light sources on both sides? That said, I like the forcefulness of your statements especially 1 min in when you stated "it ends now" and then introduced yourself and the company. With that in mind, I do believe the elevator pitch was not to exceed 1 min? Part of my discussion via email with Dr. Vogt was about the length of the pitch and in his words "most potential backers will have their decision made in 10-15 secs, so if it is going to be longer than 1 min you'd better be able to keep my attention". I know for me it was tough to keep mine to 1 min and I stressed out over it for sometime.  That said, you did a very good job keeping my attention for the 2 mins plus. I think it was the 'personal touch' that keep me there. Great job! As an English (grammar-loving) teacher I do agree with your concept that "grammar is the backbone of communication", and it is something we are losing in schools.  I like the fact that you were able to discuss the problem and sell a solution using technology that students already have.  With respect to the venture pitch your medium of communication (website) was a very good choice and the content presented was strong and convincing. Within your "Microgram Progress" section I enjoyed how you provided step-down visual charts using different color schemes.  As a potential investor and a visual person, I would have to say this helped me understand the process better and further facilitated my need to invest in your idea. Bravo! The use of imbedding a CUBE analysis within your online resource was another very good decision as it provides to the potential investors the entire story of your venture giving it further structure and strength.  I also appreciated your page/word choice called "The Ask" - a much better way to look for a pledge.  If I were to recommend any additions it would be the use of more media in the form of audio or video throughout the site especially on "The Ask" page if it was your intention to have that as your "kickstarter-like" page. Having audio and video of people using this product and supporting the direction you are going in may had further strength to a great package. Finally, I just wanted to highlight the content used in the "offerings" page as it provided extra support  from referenced research making  your argument a viable investment for me. I'm in! Great job!

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9 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

wow Justin. Wonderful. I love your pitch it was so engaging--and introduced so many valid points. I once sent an email and, of course, in a hurry I used the wrong ''your'' and got crushed for it. The video could have been a bit shorter but other than that--wow. The website is incredible as well. My first question was, how does this differ from Grammarly and you answered it superbly. The rollout seems a bit long. I would hope, as an EVA, that I could invest in a prouduct sooner to launch, but it is still a great product. I wonder if the app section can be re-done. I know that as a teacher there are tons of apps that I wish I could ask my students to use, so adding one more might be a small concern for some. I also loved your use of educational ''theory''. Space learning is such an important concept that I am always surprised people are not more aware of it. Space learning, alongside a microlearning method, is how the next generation of workers and students will have to learn. Great work Justin!

9 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
ali hodroje @ahodaire

wow Justin. Wonderful. I love your pitch it was so engaging--and introduced so many valid points. I once sent an email and, of course, in a hurry I used the wrong ''your'' and got crushed for it. The video could have been a bit shorter but other than that--wow. The website is incredible as well. My first question was, how does this differ from Grammarly and you answered it superbly. The rollout seems a bit long. I would hope, as an EVA, that I could invest in a prouduct sooner to launch, but it is still a great product. I wonder if the app section can be re-done. I know that as a teacher there are tons of apps that I wish I could ask my students to use, so adding one more might be a small concern for some. I also loved your use of educational ''theory''. Space learning is such an important concept that I am always surprised people are not more aware of it. Space learning, alongside a microlearning method, is how the next generation of workers and students will have to learn. Great work Justin!

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9 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

Nice work Justin. The importance of good grammar is becoming a lost art as young teachers enter the workforce with less and less background in the subject. I think your app has a lot of potential in that respect. I like the fact that your app is not a grammar checker that alleviates the need to learn grammar. As you point out, good grammar is what makes a person an expert communicator. I liked the elevator pitch, but it could be rewritten to be under a bout 90 seconds. Your website is set up logically and your headings allowed me to go back and find what I was looking for easily. Strengths include your CUBE analysis of your venture and decision to go mobile and micro. Not only this, you back up this decision well with research. My first concern as an EVA is the idea of marketing to teachers individually. Teachers like to help students but most don’t have the resources to invest in apps for their class. The number of apps that I wish I could use in my class is high and that forces you to compete with every other type of education app on the market when it comes to getting me to pay for your app. I would give teachers a chance to use the app for free in order to garner support. Teachers that sign up for free could become GURUS that help establish your apps presence in the K-12 market. I would offer increased functionality to schools or boards that sign on so they could use the big data to track student progress on a board level. My second concern may be unfounded based on your research, however I still have concerns about the availability of mobile devices across the group. I teach in a private school where nearly all kids carry an Iphone 6 in their bag, but my wife works for the board where this is not the case. In a few years many of the best grammarians will be retiring and at that point I will be ready to recommend Microgram as a great investment. The face of your company could be my grandma, whose penmanship, grammar and use of the ruler as a disciplinary tool were legendary. :)

9 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
Ryan Dorey @rdorey

Nice work Justin. The importance of good grammar is becoming a lost art as young teachers enter the workforce with less and less background in the subject. I think your app has a lot of potential in that respect. I like the fact that your app is not a grammar checker that alleviates the need to learn grammar. As you point out, good grammar is what makes a person an expert communicator. I liked the elevator pitch, but it could be rewritten to be under a bout 90 seconds. Your website is set up logically and your headings allowed me to go back and find what I was looking for easily. Strengths include your CUBE analysis of your venture and decision to go mobile and micro. Not only this, you back up this decision well with research. My first concern as an EVA is the idea of marketing to teachers individually. Teachers like to help students but most don’t have the resources to invest in apps for their class. The number of apps that I wish I could use in my class is high and that forces you to compete with every other type of education app on the market when it comes to getting me to pay for your app. I would give teachers a chance to use the app for free in order to garner support. Teachers that sign up for free could become GURUS that help establish your apps presence in the K-12 market. I would offer increased functionality to schools or boards that sign on so they could use the big data to track student progress on a board level. My second concern may be unfounded based on your research, however I still have concerns about the availability of mobile devices across the group. I teach in a private school where nearly all kids carry an Iphone 6 in their bag, but my wife works for the board where this is not the case. In a few years many of the best grammarians will be retiring and at that point I will be ready to recommend Microgram as a great investment. The face of your company could be my grandma, whose penmanship, grammar and use of the ruler as a disciplinary tool were legendary. :)

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  • venture pitch review
7 Aug Posted on Microgram- communicate clearer

REVIEW: This is a strong pitch, Justin! Faced with such a large and diverse curriculum to cover over the whole year, high-school English teachers usually gloss over formal grammar lessons quickly, in favour of more interesting units such as poetry, drama, short-stories, novel study, creative writing etc. This means students usually are not getting the fundamentals of grammar taught consistently throughout the year, and as such their writing suffers horribly. I love the combination of mobile-learning, and micro-learning in a fun platform to encourage learning grammar. Encouraging students to complete short units every week means they are consistently improving their skills, and not having to ‘cram’ grammar points into their brains over the course of a short 2-week unit that is sandwiched between other units. As a teacher in an EFL context, grammar is a constant issue, however as a subject teacher (History/Socials/Media Studies/ Computer Information Systems) I do not have time to explicitly teach grammar issues while covering my class curriculum. Identifying the key re-occurring issues (such as problems with active/passive voice), and then prescribing relevant units from MicroGram is a perfect solution! Your pitch’s CUBE analysis is an extremely comprehensive and compelling case for the merits of your venture, and you have clearly made your case for its success. You also thoroughly highlighted your competition’s flaws while displaying your venture’s ability to outperform them. Your business plan is clear and shows achievable goals that will utilize investor’s funding effectively. With these factors in my mind as an EVA, I would definitely recommend investing in your venture.

7 Aug
0 Thumbs Up!
Ryan Stotesbury @stotes

REVIEW: This is a strong pitch, Justin! Faced with such a large and diverse curriculum to cover over the whole year, high-school English teachers usually gloss over formal grammar lessons quickly, in favour of more interesting units such as poetry, drama, short-stories, novel study, creative writing etc. This means students usually are not getting the fundamentals of grammar taught consistently throughout the year, and as such their writing suffers horribly. I love the combination of mobile-learning, and micro-learning in a fun platform to encourage learning grammar. Encouraging students to complete short units every week means they are consistently improving their skills, and not having to ‘cram’ grammar points into their brains over the course of a short 2-week unit that is sandwiched between other units. As a teacher in an EFL context, grammar is a constant issue, however as a subject teacher (History/Socials/Media Studies/ Computer Information Systems) I do not have time to explicitly teach grammar issues while covering my class curriculum. Identifying the key re-occurring issues (such as problems with active/passive voice), and then prescribing relevant units from MicroGram is a perfect solution! Your pitch’s CUBE analysis is an extremely comprehensive and compelling case for the merits of your venture, and you have clearly made your case for its success. You also thoroughly highlighted your competition’s flaws while displaying your venture’s ability to outperform them. Your business plan is clear and shows achievable goals that will utilize investor’s funding effectively. With these factors in my mind as an EVA, I would definitely recommend investing in your venture.

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