Mark Bates

Hi Mike,

Design wise, I thought you did a good job using the affordances of Powtoon - minimal text, icon use, and animation. Content wise, it was also good in that you indicated to investors that you were a start-up seeking assistance, the size of the potential market and how your idea would access it.

You were able to elaborate on the information provided in the Elevator Pitch. Some ideas for improvement would be: including estimates (possibly from research) of the number of video game addicts as the market size of users would not necessarily be addicts or seeking assistance, more information on the delivery and business model. Also although eye catching the image on slide number 2 might be off-putting to potential investors.

Mark

Hi John,

First - Your co-presenter is awesome. In particular, the ears.

I liked the straight up presentation used in the video. Using the entrance/exit tactic did make me wonder what was going to happen so I was locked in from start to end. In regards to content, I think it depends on who was viewing the pitch and what their background (e.g. spa industry, education, etc.). I think you explained the 'float' concept well but not so much with why there is the demand for such a product to be incorporated.

From your Venture Pitch, I interpret what you are offering as being a learning experience. In the Profitability section, I would have liked to see the costs for the 'audio/visual units' that would deliver content and the costs associated with creating that content. I feel the Strong Value to Our Community section could have been shortened and placed in the initial Our Venture section. It would allow you to place more emphasis on economic benefits that an investor is primarily concerned with.

Mark

Hi Benjamin,

I like this category of apps that attempt to enrich activities through augmented reality of some sort. Nice idea.

In thought your video Elevator Pitch did a pretty good job of introducing your app (e.g. market, revenue stream, etc.). I like the idea of teachers being able to create lesson and then sell them in a market place. A a possible improvement would been to elaborate slightly on its use once in student's hands to help differentiated from a regular school trip or how that makes the app that much better.

Your Venture Pitch covered most of the areas that investors would be interested in after seeing your Elevator Pitch. The inclusion of an additional video amongst the text was a nice feature. I think you pitch would have been further strengthened by having an introduction of yourself and team, a comparison of your product versus the competition outlining why yours is better, and more information on either the size of the market or its performance. Otherwise, this is product that is easily imagined as a useful tool for educators.

Mark

Hi Owen,

Nice job with your elevator pitch via a video on YouTube. I liked how you 'invited' the viewer to be a part of the venture. You laid out key features such as pain point, business model, market and the 'ask'. Although I found the pitch effective, the sunglasses distracting and lessened the affordance of video to interpret facial expression.

The video for your venture pitch of E-mmersion (clever name) was very informative. You hit key points such as indicating passion for project, personal experience in the area, linked relevant research and elaborated on pain points addressed. Your knowledge of the needs of the immersion community were evident. I like how you worked the safety angle, the large market (North America and Europe), possibly to expand to other popular languages, and the endorsement. From a design perspective, I would suggest eliminating text animations, unifying text layouts, making a greater differentiation between headings and body or simply using larger full screen images with minimal text overlay.
<br. Mark

Hi Kamille,

I thought your PowToon video did a good job of explaining Workforce Technology Solutions. My only suggestions for your Elevator Pitch on the content side would have been an initial slide to introduce yourself and one indicating how a potential investor would make money or a little more detail on how it would save the consumer money. Design wise, I would suggest changing the background music or at least having it change to something more upbeat by the 24 second mark when you introduce the solution.

With the Venture Pitch, you presented a good rationale for the products existence but I felt it was lacking in other areas. Your pitch would have been strengthened with the presentation of more information on the current state of the market, competition's areas of weakness, marketing strategies and business plan. In regards to design and if your intent was for the document to be viewed by potential investors, the use of more magazine-style layout would help for readability.

Mark

Hi Ariane,

First, nice use of TouchCast in your Elevator Pitch. I really like that app. You did a nice job technically in using its features such as the vote and benefits overlays. In regards to content, I though you gave just enough information about ProDev Planner to gain interest. I liked how you brought familiarity to your new product by linking it with such a ubiquitous one like MS Outlook.

I liked the choice of UberFlip to display your Venture Pitch. It gives the virtual experience of flipping through the magazine style layout. I think your layout in general is great. It made the volume of text easier to read an navigate and gave a more polished and professional impression. In regards to content, I like how your product has applicability to many markets and consumer groups. Being able to cite 1.2 billion possible consumers is nice as well as the products possible integration into other system. One thing that could have been added was where you were or how you were going to develop the product to give the investor a sense of time until reaching market. Overall great job.

Mark

Hi Kari,

I thought your Elevator Pitch did a good job of stating what you product was and that it was unique. You covered the main areas of this type of pitch as well. From a design perspective, I though you used Prezi well in this application - use of voice over, connection between voice over and information presented on slide and pacing. My only suggestion in that regard is that you could cut down text even further to key words and enlarge images.

I liked several factors presented in your Venture Pitch such as basis in academic research and detailed explanation of value to end user/consumer. I thought you could have given more detail on your business model and distribution (e.g. if it was to be available in both Apple and Android marketplaces, etc.). Also I thought you would have been justified in asking for more investment and an expanded time frame.

Mark

Hi Rupi,

I liked how your elevator pitch left just enough information out concerning how the product functions to pique curiosity. TalkBoard is an interesting concept especially for the assistive technology market. I liked how you used repetitive wording like 'Envision' to give uniformity throughout the presentation and the tag line on the final slide. What I would have like would have been hearing you voice versus ready the text on the first half of the slides. I thought the better designed slides were from the 1 minute mark on.

I liked the corporate professional look with the venture pitch design, uniform text styling and use of charts and diagrams to add explanation. I wonder if using a tool like InDesign or Publisher would have provided methods to break up larger blocks of text for better readability. However, I liked the well throughout design of your product that was presented as well as a good focus on the 'ask; and what was in the venture for the potential investors.

Mark

Hi,

I've broken my comments down for each pitch. However, I did want to commend you for the use of technology in both presentations - PowToon and Weebly.

Elevator Pitch
I found that I did want to learn more about your product at the end of the pitch, good use of iconography and music was suitable. I chose to provide my comments before viewing the Venture Pitch. My main suggestions here would have been to add a voice over so that you could have decrease some of the text on-screen, and if not slowed the transition rate, and clarify what information is the 'hook' for the consumer.

Venutre Pitch
The idea of creating a corporate site for your product is interesting and shows creativity. The design walks the visitor through some key areas of a venture pitch. I think this would be a great feature for investors to be able to go to after an in-person pitch. I thought if it were a pitch, the 'ask' made in the Elevator Pitch could have been moved here with more detail on how profit was going to be achieved.

Mark