Stephen Walsh

Thank you all for your input. Let me address a few items you have mentioned.

First, many are concerned about the invasive nature of a student basically wearing a tracking device. I knew this myself as I wrote it in. I had conceived the idea of a smartwatch for school and this was a feature I knew it could solve rather easily. If anyone has ever gotten a call from the office looking for a child who was there, but you hadn't put them in the system because they slipped in after you submitted attendance, knows what I am getting at here. Perhaps we could market it as a safety feature. I am sure parents would like to know where their students are throughout the day. Believe me, I share the concerns about privacy and such. Perhaps it can be as simple as turning off location services or just leave the E-Bit in their locker when they leave school, you know, to charge up.

Rodney (rstpierre) makes a good point that pitching hardware is quantitatively different than an app or service. As I read other pitches I was struck by how easily they could be implemented compared to the idea I conceived, one that would be competing with the likes of Apple and Samsung. I am really out of my element here. I chose $150 dollars because it seems reasonable. But the device, as others have mentioned, is perhaps not even technologically feasible at this time and its competitors are selling in the $600 range. Perhaps a lower price point can be achieved by convincing departments of education to subsidize the product, but that is a whole other can of worms.

In the end, Noan hit on the real benefit of my idea. I wanted to think of a way that we could change schools from a class-based environment to a learning community where students roam at their own pace and attend learning experiences at their lesiure. Can a device like the E-Bit initiate a change like that or will it need to begin systemically?

Thanks for all your input and for the great examples you have all set with your own pitches.

Dan, I am happy to review your venture because your feedback has always been detailed and constructive. Unfortunately, many of the salient points have already been made by our more-than-competent classmates. I love the idea and I think it has a market that can be exploited. I am always amazed that anything gets back to school at all. “This is an important form that needs to be returned by Friday,” I plead with them as they crumple and stuff the thoughtfully colored paper into their already disastrous backpacks. And there is always that one sheet you find under the desks after they have all left. A more exacting way to get forms filled out is just what I need. And this app could decrease my stress by streamlining that hectic morning moment where change for this and that are filling up ziploc bags in my desk. So my only question and concern is, when will you get it rolled out in Newfoundland?

Claudia, you have developed a great pitch. The layout and the logical progression of information was easy to read and digest. I need this product. I have said elsewhere that assessment is an aspect of my teaching practice that I really struggle with. Just listening to that photocopier churn out paper assessments that I know the students will hate and that will only yield dubious assessment value, sets my teeth on edge. So from a teacher’s perspective, I am already hooked.

From an EVA’s perspective I find that you have answered all my questions sufficiently. I especially enjoy the competitor comparison (Nothing Beats Bolt!). It is a simple graphic but does so much to show how Bolt covers more bases than anyone else in the business. Your 12 month action plan also confers confidence to potential investors.

Your site looks very professional. My suggestion would be to add some more ‘academic’ sources to your pitch. For example, you mention ‘authentic’ student work. Perhaps some research into why or how Bolt would be better than paper tests would help sell it to overwhelmed administrators.

Great work.

Chris, congratulations on the detailed, professional pitch. I think your venture is timely and necessary. I am excited about the changes that deep learning and computing power can bring to education. You have laid out a venture that addresses the area of education that I struggle with the most; assessment. I have engaged with open resources more and more in recent years but there is always the sticky problem of assessment and certification. Your venture seems to elegantly provide a solution.

I think your ask and marketing strategies are well developed. The other posters have raised interesting questions to which I will add only one. Since instructors will be adding questions to the bank, who is curating the well. This suggests a further question as to what makes your algorithm qualified to assess these diveres subjects?

Lastly, you didn’t spin your venture this way but I think you could get some people on board for the altruistic, “open” movement aspect of it. I know you are paid and asking for subscriptions but you are promoting an open movement that moves away from paper and “the big guys”. Perhaps that could be a marketing tool you could consider in the future.

Mariana, nice work on the pitch. I enjoyed the executive summary format more than I thought I would. The information that I am trying to find is neatly laid out and labeled. Furthermore, you have discovered a niche market that I hadn’t considered before. I have heard it repeated in many places that finding the problem to be solved is half the battle for a successful venture.

The posts by Jesse and Briar have aptly identified some strengths and weaknesses with your pitch. I will not reiterate them here. I was intrigued by your choices throughout the venture. Like Chris noted, it seems your “venture” is more of an established business but as you illuminate, you are looking for investors to help expand your venture. You are trying to keep up with demand. The fact that syou have already seen much success is reassuring. As an amateur investor, I find it much easier to hop on a bandwagon than to board a train with an uncertain destination.

The numbers you present are impressive. There seems to really be a vacuum in that industry that is just waiting to be filled by a competent entrepreneur like yourself.  

Dan Bosse, great work on the venture. I went the website route because I thought sustaining the energy for a full length pitch would be too difficult but you have done a nice job. Do you have access to a green screen?

Firstly, I like how you have introduced yourself immediately with a description of your credentials. As an investor, I am counting on you, and I quickly know why you are qualified to run this business. You go on to succinctly lay out the benefits of the telepresence venture. I can, by 2:10, know exactly why this product will be needed.

I think a real strength of your venture is the fact that you market to teachers and admin at the school level but also to the educational institutions. I work on the educational committee of an Aquarium and one perennial stumbling block is how to get the experience to the audience. So I see the need from a teacher’s point of view but also from that of the sites they wish to visit.

Another strength of your pitch is the detailed explanation of how it works, from the business, training, and logistics, to the credentialing and feedback on interpreters. You really seem to know this venture inside and out.

I think one weakness might be the lack of real or predicted numbers. You seem to understand revenue streams intimately and your apparent knowledge is reassuring to an amateur investor like myself, but if I were to invest, what are you asking and what am I to expect in return?

Lastly, your elevator pitch and long-form pitch are full of great images brought together with good editing, but from 3:10 onward your pitch consists of you speaking from that boardroom. Perhaps you could have broken up the last part of your pitch with some more images or figures.

Nice work.

Esther, congratulations on the interesting pitch. I found your idea very original. I don’t have the type of business experience that would need this service but it is a niche that I hadn’t considered before and so was interested to hear you lay it out.

My main question would be delivery. I am not sure how CompanyCAVU is creating the ‘journey’ that improves onboarding. Is it a corporate video, role playing game, or some sort of written narrative? Basically I need to know more about the 'micro model digital storytelling'. It sounds awesome. Perhaps a couple of images would help me make the leap to full understanding.

Your three-tier revenue model seems very professional. I would like to see some numbers or projected earnings before investing but I like how you have differentiated CopanyCAVU’s worth across different sectors.

I love the tagline on the competitors page. You simultaneously acknowledge the competition while differentiating yourself from them. It shows me, an amateur investor, that you know the field and how to improve upon it.

Finally, your team seems diverse and competent. I would have confidence investing in such an experienced group of innovators and business people. Perhaps some pictures would help soften your pitch with a human face. I took the easy way out in my venture but using cartoonish avatars, but I thought that was better than simply listing names and titles. But who knows, perhaps the cartoons would turn off certain investing professionals.

Nice work.

Rob Theriault, I am so glad someone took on AR. I am extremely interested in VR, AR, and the next generation of media. I enjoyed both of your pitches as they were well paced and visually pleasing. (What did you use to make the pitches?). The visuals really bring home the possibilities of AR. You will have no trouble convincing people that AR is a useful tool that schools should strive to incorporate.

I was particularly drawn to your concern with research. Your venture has that humanitarian slant that will appeal to people interested in furthering the tech for altruistic or personal motivations. You say you are interested in the research side and can collaborate, but as an investor I would like more specific details.

Your venture is basically acting as a facilitator that helps schools navigate the perhaps confusing world of AR technology (“hardware, software, media design, experts, training, and 24/7 support”). As an educator, I would be interested in some curriculum integration. You might help tech-weary teachers actually plan the lessons that will use AR.

Finally, I think there is a lot of promise here. I have considered this type of ventures for other areas, such as science. For example, Little Green Thumbs provides training, equipment, and curriculum materials for numerous “life cycle of a plant” outcomes in public schools in Canada. The experience they facilitate could not be easily accomplished by a regular teacher with every other subject to worry about. So this type of “facilitatory’ venture might have some real promise.

Yuandi Du, nice work on the pitch.

I like the conversational concept for the elevator pitch.  I haven’t seen that used yet. And that Kimmel bit was a great touch. Throughout ETEC 522 I have been thinking about Dragon’s Den and Shark Tank. The boys could definitely use Bizschool.

The site is well organized and I find the high-contrast color scheme gives it a very professional air. Your “Biz Market” is excellent. Your pitch, in general, seems well researched but this section in particular convinces an investor that you have done your homework. The fact that you analysed the competition so transparently gives me confidence that you understand the market and are differentiated sufficiently.

I would appreciate a more detailed “Plan and Asking” section. As an investor, this is perhaps the most important section. I understand the difficulty from my own experience with this assignment, but perhaps just adding a few more projections that include the customer base and unit cost. I share Briar’s questions about how this venture is supposed to make money.

Mark, great work on your pitch. Like those below, I am enamored by your product name. I wonder to what extent a product's success depends on the name. In the make or break moment of the elevator pitch, it is certainly important to have something catchy. Luckily for you, your product is more than just a clever title. Your venture pitch is detailed and informative. I think your 123D U idea is a great way to add value to your product, especially given that part of your pitch is the ease at which a teacher can utilize your product. Having a community to rely upon with ready made lessons will be vital to drawing people to your product. Furthermore, testimonials added a level of confidence that your product has seen success already. Two areas where you could improve upon are management and competition. You mentioned that your team has 20 years experience, but if you expanded on the skills you and your team bring to the table, I would have more confidence investing in you. Finally, competition can be fierce in the app market given that almost any developer can enter the worldwide market rather effortlessly. Is your app different enough for consumers to seek it out and download it? 123D Catch, for example, seems to be a direct competitor. If you could show how you are different (and better) than the competition, I would be more inclined to invest.